Wednesday, March 23, 2016

Staying Mindful

Both girls are napping and as I sit here drinking my (second) iced coffee, I feel the need to write and reflect.  We have been going full speed ahead for awhile now and it is definitely wearing on me.  Our weeks are full of activities, play dates, errands, and other responsibilities.  While most of those things are fun, we really don't spend all that much time at home (outside of naps).  On top of these activities, I try to squeeze in time to respond to emails and messages, run Sloan and Co., and work on my blog.  Our weekends seem even crazier, family time just the four of us has been lacking.  I'm so thankful I have so many amazing things in my life, but I have definitely lost perspective lately.  Life feels unbalanced (again) and my babies are growing so quickly.  Sloan is almost three and is seriously turning into such a kid and not much of a toddler at all.  Phayre changes everyday and it actually overwhelms me how fast time is flying by with my second baby.  Side note: she has started saying "guh" and it is the cutest thing ever.  It's more like, "Guh, guh, uhhh guh, guh, guh!"

Anyways, lets get back on track... I woke up to Sloan calling for me this morning and when I walked into her room she said, "Mommy, can I help you make breaky today?"  I scooped her up and we headed downstairs.  P slept in so we got to make and eat breakfast just the two of us.  We sang her favorite songs and listed all the characters names in Disney movies (she loves doing this right now).  Phayre finally woke up and I nursed her while Sloan played quietly in her playroom.  While I looked down at P nursing and then up at Sloan playing so nicely, I was filled with so much gratitude.  I have a freaking amazing life!  Like really really incredible.  Not to mention, it's all I've ever dreamed of.  My husband is so kind and works harder than anyone I know so that I can stay home with not one, but two perfect little girls.  Our girls.  Our little blessings that we prayed, and hoped, and dreamed, and wished for.  

When I finished nursing P, I sat her on the floor and Sloan immediately started bringing her toys.  Another side note: P will never crawl, Sloan brings her everything :).  Sloan sat there talking to her sister and I stood above them in awe.  I had to snap a picture because that very normal, mundane moment just felt so incredible.  

I know what you're thinking, "Wow, why the sappy post Marisa?!"  And to be quite honest I'm not sure.  All I can say is that recently I've lost focus of whats important.  I have felt rushed and spread way too thin.  I've been doubting myself and wondering if I'm doing a good job, living in the moment enough, or being the best that I can be?  The truth is I probably haven't been doing all of those things well.  Sometimes life gets in the way and you can't sit and savor every single moment (ok maybe not sometimes, maybe most of the time).  But today I woke up mindful of these things and I gained some perspective.  I am a wife and mother before anything else.  I need to make sure that those areas of my life are taken care of first.  

Annnnnnd just like that my sweet little Phayre Bear is awake and cooing for her Mama.  And by cooing for me I mean, "A guh, guh, guhhhhhhhhhhhhh." :)




  1. I needed to read this at this very moment. THANK YOU! Thank you for opening up and getting sappy, and honest. I feel this way more often than I'll ever admit. My sweet Tatum just turned 9 months and i find all kinds of guilt swirling around my head as she does not do the same things my older daughter did by this age. She is sooooo happy, just like P, but too will never crawl! It's not for lack of pushing her (literally) or coaxing with toys or food, or acting like the world greatest cheerleader.
    So again, thank you for your real-ness Momma.

  2. This post has resonated with me in so many ways... I have had so many signs, callings, urges to "Be Still" and "Be Grateful" recently - to the point where I have stopped in my tracks, tears rolling down my cheeks in gratitude for the life I live... Thank you for sharing these moments x


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